I've had a bit of a revelation, so of course, I'm sharing it with you - you're welcome.

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about what truly matters in people - and it’s never the superficial stuff. I’ve never been drawn to appearances or material things. What really matters is who someone is as a person. Lately, it’s become even clearer to me that what really counts are their values - the essence of who they are at their core.

But the thing is, the more I get clear on my own values - what really matters to me - the more I notice I naturally start gravitating toward people who share those same values.

For me, it’s things like authenticity, kindness, compassion, growth. But I didn’t always know how deeply I valued these qualities, or how essential they were in other people too. I had to go on some winding, weird paths to figure that out. I think we all do. You have to go on a little journey to understand yourself, to figure out what matters most to you, and to notice when other people share those same beliefs.

I’ve also started realising that it’s not just about knowing your values - it’s actually even more important to express them. I guess I used to be scared of that. Putting myself out there, showing who I truly am, and speaking my beliefs felt vulnerable. It was easier, safer even, to just put up a wall.

But I’m still learning, and the more I’ve practiced being open - thanks to the safety of certain people I’ve met and the experiences I’ve had - the easier it’s become. The more I allow myself to be authentic, the more aligned I feel with my own life and the people around me.

And that clarity also explains why some people just don’t feel right. Or why we feel drawn to certain people, almost without trying. It’s not random - it’s values in action. It’s connection happening at a deeper level than appearances, interests, or “fun activities.”

I’m not saying that anyone who doesn’t share your values is a bad person - far from it. Everyone has their own beliefs and ways of seeing the world. But when your life is guided by what you truly value, and you have the courage to express that openly, something pretty amazing happens: the people who genuinely share those values naturally gravitate toward you. That’s when friendships, relationships, and even just the people in your circle start to feel like home.

So yeah - this is my little revelation. Maybe it’s obvious to some people, but for me, it’s fresh, and it feels important. Stop thinking about life in terms of what you have, what you do, or what you look like. Start thinking about who you are, what you value, and how to express that. The right people will show up - and the connections will be worth it. 🩷